My version of peace

My version of peace

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Heart Talk

I just watched "Despicable Me II."  As I continue through out my week, the visual images of purple ferocious minions sticks in my minds eye.  The sight of a small creature, stressed to capacity; eyes tweaking, hair that looks like a perm gone horribly wrong, barely holding back ability to attack whatever is in its path, continues to make me chuckle.  Not because I find such a sight enjoyable, but because I think of what being really stressed can look like, and I wonder if sometimes I end up looking like a waddling, frizzy, snarling thing, all out of sorts and ready to lash out if pushed one bit further.  My eye tweaks sometimes.  I wonder if that is an indication of stress.  It's really annoying.  
Maybe I don't end up looking quite so extreme when I am feeling overwhelmed with, oh you know...LIFE, but I do experience tell tale signs of the presence of... let's call it "tension."  
My heart gets really tight and achey.  It's a deep ache.  The kind that is hard to shake.  Usually as I get through my work day, the ache subsides as do the demands of the day.  It's mostly something that I find myself pressing through, dealing with...but not really.  Mostly, just waiting for the symptoms to subside.  I think most of us have come to accept stress and the experience that comes with it, as a "normal" part of life, and just something that we must endure and push through.  The slogan, "No pain, no gain," comes to mind.  And yes, while some stress can be productive and helpful, often ignoring what our body or mind is trying to tell us can be harmful.  
What is my heart trying to tell me?  What am I ignoring?  I've been asking myself these questions lately.    Something is not right.  Perhaps it never will be completely right.  Maybe that is the state of things.  Maybe my heart knows that things are not quite as they should be and will continue to remind me of this.  

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